Kinky Friedman Quotes
Quotations and aphorisms by Kinky Friedman:
I'll sign anything except bad legislation.
~Kinky Friedman
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We were a country band with a social conscience.
~Kinky Friedman
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I'll tell you right now. I'm for prayer in school.
~Kinky Friedman
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The folks in Mississippi are saying, 'Thank God for Texas.'
~Kinky Friedman
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And I think musicians can better run this state than politicians. And, hell, beauticians can better run the state than politicians.
~Kinky Friedman
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I admit I was drinking a Guinness... but I did not swallow.
~Kinky Friedman
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William Bennett is my patron saint, one of them. Redd Foxx is another.
~Kinky Friedman
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If you ain't Texan, I ain't got time for you.
~Kinky Friedman
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I see an issue I like, and I support it.
~Kinky Friedman
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I don't remember the first half of my life. All I say is a happy childhood is the worst possible preparation for life.
~Kinky Friedman
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I'm too young for Medicare and too old for women to care.
~Kinky Friedman
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Students don't know who Mark Twain was because he wasn't on the test.
~Kinky Friedman
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May the God of your choice bless and keep you. I respect Him as long as He does not circumcise me anymore.
~Kinky Friedman
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I don't apologize to people who try to intimidate.
~Kinky Friedman
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Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
~Kinky Friedman
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We've got to clear some of the room out of the prisons so we can put the bad guys in there, like the pedophiles and the politicians.
~Kinky Friedman
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A happy childhood... is the worst possible preparation for life.
~Kinky Friedman
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I have a better head of hair than Rick Perry; it's just not in a place I can show you.
~Kinky Friedman
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I admit to drinking it, but I did not swallow.
~Kinky Friedman
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These days, there are many people around the world who listen to the songs that made me infamous and read the books that made me respectable.
~Kinky Friedman
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Politics is the only field in which the more experience you have, the worse you get.
~Kinky Friedman
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Money can buy you a fine dog, but only love can make him wag his tail.
~Kinky Friedman
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I'll keep us out of war with Oklahoma!
~Kinky Friedman
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I even went so far as to become a Southern Baptist for a while, until I realized that they didn't hold 'em under long enough.
~Kinky Friedman
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The teachers are getting screwed, blued, and tattooed by the system.
~Kinky Friedman
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You struggle with your demons and you conquer them.
~Kinky Friedman
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Remember: Y'all is singular. All y'all is plural. All y'all's is plural possessive.
~Kinky Friedman
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Yes, I'm a Judeo-Christian. Jesus and Moses are in my heart, and... both of them were independents, by the way.
~Kinky Friedman
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No, nothing has changed in my life at all, and nothing would change if I had millions.
~Kinky Friedman
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Young people are the key to this election.
~Kinky Friedman
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If Willie Nelson had been Rosa Parks, there never would have been a civil rights movement in this country, because he refuses to leave the back of the bus.
~Kinky Friedman
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Musicians can run this state better than politicians. We won't get a lot done in the mornings, but we'll work late and be honest.
~Kinky Friedman
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How can you look at the Texas legislature and still believe in intelligent design?
~Kinky Friedman
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I just want Texas to be number one in something other than executions, toll roads and property taxes.
~Kinky Friedman
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The first thing I'll do if elected is demand a recount.
~Kinky Friedman
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The Democrats and Republicans are the same guy admiring themself in the mirror.
~Kinky Friedman
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We've had to be creative to get on the ballot.
~Kinky Friedman
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When I'm governor... I'll be the first governor with a listed telephone number.
~Kinky Friedman
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I support gay marriage. I believe they have a right to be as miserable as the rest of us.
~Kinky Friedman
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We're first on executions. We're 49th in funding public education. We're in a race with Mississippi for the bottom, and we're winning.
~Kinky Friedman
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The only currency I value is the coin of the spirit. That's very important in my life.
~Kinky Friedman
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I never apologize for the truth. And the truth here is that racists come in many different colors.
~Kinky Friedman
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You have to pretend that your life is a financial pleasure even when your autographs are bouncing.
~Kinky Friedman
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Well, I just said that Jesus and I were both Jewish and that neither of us ever had a job, we never had a home, we never married and we traveled around the countryside irritating people.
~Kinky Friedman
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I don't apologize to people with an agenda.
~Kinky Friedman
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I've always said money may buy you a fine dog, but only love can make it wag its tail.
~Kinky Friedman
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